Look For The Helpers.

Today is a day where everyone remembers where they were, the feelings they felt and the days following. I’m sure I’m not alone in that September 11th always serves as a day of reflection and remembering how much happened and what it signified. I remember a lot from that day – much of which I wish I could forget, but much of which I am grateful for remembering.  There are no words that can be written or spoken to describe the flood of memories and the emotions that go along with them which always come back when revisiting that day in my mind. It’s an emotion or set of emotions that every American who lived through it has experienced and will continue to, I’m sure, until the day we die.

Sitting here now writing this, I wonder how much that day specifically changed me. I was in my junior year of college which is a time of life most people do a lot of growing regardless of an unspeakably tragic day occurring. Sometimes I wish I could revisit the me before September 11, 2001 and pinpoint EXACTLY how it changed me, my personality, my perspective – the good, the bad, and the ugly.

A prominent memory that stands out in my mind is the togetherness that occurred in the days, weeks, months following. At that time, in order to get to and from my classes, I had to walk through a large parking lot – “Lot B” – to get to my apartment on campus. Every day, multiple times a day, I’d walk through a sea of cars painted with words of love, support, unity, and togetherness. It was an unprecedented time where we were all grasping for something to hold on to and that something, appeared to me, anyway, was love and kindness. I had never seen anything like it.

I remember seeing a quote, by Mr. Rogers saying, “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping. Look for the helpers.’”

My mind stayed so focused on that because I think my 20 year old brain was struggling to make sense of what had happened – what was happening and what would continue to happen. In hindsight, I think that was how I coped. I still think that’s how I cope with anything unpleasant.  

“Look for the helpers.” 

The thing is, a helper doesn’t need to be someone who does something so grand it makes the news.

In my mind, the helpers were (and are) people being kind. Back then, it was people who painted their cars with words of kindness. Those people may have felt so incredibly helpless and maybe how they coped was painting their cars, but to those people who painted their cars – thank you. That helped me more than I realized at the time.

The helpers were also the people who were a little softer. Saying thank you and I love you and how are you and just. being. kind. The energy of kindness was like a soothing balm on an open wound that you just didn’t know when it would heal. We all went through something that day that brought us together in a way I will never ever forget. To me, that wound has never fully been healed and it probably never will be. 

But, there are still the helpers. 

They are the people who let you go in front of you in a grocery store line when you have 1 item and they have 28497249827. The people in line in front of you at the coffee shop who pay for your order. The people who hold doors for you. Smile at you walking down the street or say hello. Small acts of kindness that don’t cost a dime and take minimal energy, makes a bigger difference in the world – someone’s world – than most realize.  

Those are the helpers.