Historically, I was not what I would consider a spiritual person. I was raised in the Greek Orthodox church, which never really resonated with me. Internally, I always questioned a lot of things about the church.
“Because that’s how it is” never really made sense to me and never satisfied my “why’s” I would always ask to myself but never outwardly, because I was a shy kid and never wanted to go against my parents. So for years to follow, I chalked it up to my not being a religious person. I am still not what I would classify as religious.
With any belief – whether it be regarding religion, politics, marriage, children, fitness, nutrition, and otherwise, I support if someone has found something that works for them. I am happy for that person – even if it doesn’t follow suit with my beliefs or what I find to work for me. I have been taught a person always has a right to their opinion. Pushing those beliefs or opinions onto me or anyone, for that matter, is a different story.
Growing up, I was a shy kid and did everything I “was supposed to do”. I got good grades, I didn’t drink, I didn’t do drugs. I walked as straight a line as a kid could. To the point, where I recall an incident my senior year in high school, where my mother (bless her heart) was scolding me for not putting a dish in the dishwasher and I left it in the sink instead. I remember being so tired and just looking at her and said “Kids in my school drink, do drugs, have gotten pregnant, arrested… I think you need to give me a break for leaving a dish in the sink.” A very bold statement for me to say to my mother, who along with my father had very high standards for me and my brother. I am never not thankful for those standards, but regardless, a point was made and she let that argument go after I put the dish in the dishwasher as she requested.
I was fortunate enough to grow up with strong role models – both male and female. I was not brought up with the mindset of because I was female, there were limitations on what I could or could not do. This has been both a blessing and a curse. I ended up quitting before I could get fired from a job in advertising because I told my boss the way he treated people in the company was the reason the morale was so low. I had another boss (whom I actually adore and have a very good friendship with to this day), after he threw a bunch of presentation files at my feet to do research on, I quietly looked at him and said, “Are you planning on picking those up and handing them to me?” or another time where I had to calmly tell another boss to please not speak to me in the condescending manner he was.
I think back to these incidents both proud and horrified. Proud because I was raised to not tolerate disrespectful behavior and I did not. On the other hand, I don’t know if I would be so bold this many years later knowing what I know now.
I was brought up with a sense there were certain “standards”… you go to college, you get a job, you get married, you buy a house, have kids… it was not an unusual order of life events that was instilled in me. However, as I grew older, and at times, to my parents chagrin, any time something was pushed on me, I diverted. I went the opposite way. I am not someone who likes to be told what I can or cannot do without a good reason. A lot of the things I did were because someone told me I couldn’t do them or that I had to do them. This is probably why (read – It is why) I didn’t thrive in Corporate America (glass ceiling and what have you) and working for myself has seemed to work out for me better.
“You should…” “You need to… ” “You have to….” … “You’re too this…” “You’re not enough of that” “You don’t have enough time” “You don’t…” “You can’t…” and internally, this lit a fire of “Yes, I am” “Yes, I do.” “Yes, I will”, “Yes, I can”, “No, I don’t” or “Yes, I will.” With that, I would continue on my path silently going against the grain – at (several) times hitting bumps in the road – but ultimately walking the path that I know was right for me. There were (still are) days where I cry, get down on my knees and just breathe deeply knowing that the mind and thoughts are the most powerful thing. I wish more people would grasp that we are our own worst enemies and best champions.
All of these sayings have been important to me and have gotten me through some pretty low points and I believe, have helped me to get to some pretty major high points.
“Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right.”
“Leap and the net will appear.”
“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”
“Because fuck you, that’s why” – probably not the most warm and fuzzy affirmation, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say this one ran through my head quite a bit.
My socks rarely match, makeup is only for a special occasion and when I do actually put it on, I end up poking myself in the eye, my feet and hands are rarely manicured/pedicured, I can’t cook, I have body image issues and I see a therapist regularly. I have stuff like everyone else, but we have one life (ok, I actually really think we have several, but for the purposes of this post we’ll stick with this one), why the hell not do some cool shit while you’re here.
Outside your comfort zone is where the magic happens.
What Would You Do If You Weren't Afraid? 