Part of the Solution or Part of the Problem? You’ve got a fly on your head, I’m speaking and Pro Choice .

I am happy and proud to have friends and family of many political ideologies and beliefs. Several of whom I don’t agree with. I’m also happy to report, I don’t hate any of them (or anyone for that, matter) based upon their opinions and beliefs, regardless if those opinions and beliefs are different than mine.

It feels good to not hate people. I realize that sounds funny at first, but given the divisive climate of our country right now, it is actually not that outlandish of a statement. I am a firm believer of what you put out, you get back – both negative and positive. Both hate and love. Pay attention to what you’re putting out – I challenge you to stop for a moment and self-reflect, and ask yourself what feels better: When you say, “Oh I hate… ” or “Oh I love…” Does it feel good when you say “Oh I hate so and so”? My guess is no. I mean, by all means, if you like feeling like shit, keep on keeping on. I am very deliberate with my time and energy and I have no time for that.

I rarely divulge my political beliefs online or otherwise because they’re mine and – while some would argue against this (which I respect) – have nothing to do with anyone else. Just like other’s beliefs have nothing to do with me. Many actually don’t know what I believe or which way I swing politically and I kind of love that. It means I don’t alienate anyone and people are comfortable talking to me about their views. It leaves room for healthy and respectful debate, which I find significantly more productive than shutting people out. People are allowed to have their opinions. People are allowed to choose what they believe in, even if that opinion doesn’t match yours or mine.

I’m paraphrasing, but one of the best take-aways from Don Miguel Ruiz’s “The Four Agreements” – a book that totally changed my life – was the analogy of being in a movie theater. You’re watching yourself watch a movie. You realize the movie is your life. Your life from your perspective. You go into the next theater and it’s your mom. She’s watching that movie, too – except it’s from her perspective and even though all of the characters are the same, the movie is completely different. And you go into the next theatre, and it’s your dad watching the movie from his perspective and again, a completely different movie and your brother, and so on.

This helped me understand perspective better than anything. Political beliefs are a choice made by people who have had their own life experiences and have those beliefs for a reason. We may or may not know those reasons and we may not like those reasons, but it’s also not for us to tell other people what to believe in, as much as you want them to believe what you believe.
I try to be open to listening to other people’s beliefs and try really hard to be respectful when I hear something I don’t necessarily agree with. Much like anyone, I imagine, I don’t like when beliefs are pushed on me, which is why I don’t push my beliefs on others – but I still think it’s important for there to be space for dialogue and respectful – key word being respectful – debate.
What I’ve recognized more so than ever are folks who are so extreme in their views, they alienate any type of dialogue or discourse because they refuse to hear anything outside of validation of their opinion.

Yikes.

I don’t find this particularly productive. Frankly, as soon as I come across someone who is so absolute in their thinking on either side of the aisle, I shut down. I believe it actually does more harm than good and it certainly doesn’t convince me “your side is right.” It actually makes me think I don’t ever want to talk to you about politics again – and I’m sure I’m not the only one.

In these trying times I focus on love and focus on the words “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”