Failure.

The word, “failure” is a very taboo word. No one really wants to talk about their failures or feeling like a failure or not being where they want to be right now in life as a failure. I can relate to those feelings on so many levels.

Failure is inevitable in life. Some try to avoid it more than others. I used to be terrified of failure until it happened… and then happened again… and then again and so on. Failure has kicked my ass so many times in life, it’s laughable.

At this point, I would not say I welcome failure, but because I am no stranger to it anymore, it doesn’t hold the power over my head it used to, where I would curl into a ball and think my life was over.

Failure is an incredibly vulnerable term. I was embarrassed for so long about all my failures and now I almost wear them as a badge of honor because of how much I have learned from them. If you flip the script, you can look at failure as a success if you realize they always eventually lead you to the next step towards a goal.

What follows are some of my stellar failures that I used to be mortified by and the subsequent successes they ultimately led to. These are mostly career-oriented, but if you look deep enough into your own set of failures, whether they be personal or professional, hindsight usually shows they taught you valuable lessons.

FAILURE: Taking the SAT’s twice because my first score was abysmal and getting a worse score the second time around. SUCCESS: My scores never mattered. I went to college, graduated and got a job (several, actually, and none of them ever asked me what my SAT scores were).

FAILURE: Almost getting kicked out of college after pulling a 1.5 GPA my first semester in college because of working two part time jobs, a heavy commitment to being on the women’s crew team, and well… being my first semester in college and participating heavily in social activities, if you get my drift.
SUCCESS: Learned how to get my shit together under pressure and graduating with a 3.5 GPA (still not as amazing as I would have liked – but my cumulative GPA NEVER MATTERED).

FAILURE: Quitting my job in advertising at 25 before I could get fired because my boss didn’t like it when I naively told him that he was the reason our company morale was so low (no idea, why that would have been an issue for him?) – Note: he was single handedly the most unsavory human being I have met to this day and that company is no longer in business – strange

SUCCESS: I learned humility. This led to working temp jobs during the week, while working at the front desk at Planet Fitness on the weekends for $8.50 an hour. That weekend part-time job helping to make ends meet led to a 5 year career there where ultimately I was overseeing 18 corporate stores by the time I left. In that time, I also earned my MBA and a Masters in Organizational Leadership.

FAILURE: Leaving a company I loved to take a risk to do a medical device sales job that I turned out to absolutely hate.
SUCCESS: I learned that no amount of money can make you happy if you hate what you do and learning that practicing gratitude is incredibly powerful.

FAILURE: Being let go from a start-up company after making a poor decision and having to go on unemployment.
SUCCESS: Learning humility and learning empathy for those who fall on hard times, getting my real estate license just “because”, and learning to, once again, pull myself up by my bootstraps and the value of dogged determination.

FAILURE: After working in an unsatisfying job in investment banking for two years, getting myself let go (I still don’t know if I quit or was let go) from a company after having a candid conversation with my boss how working in investment banking wasn’t what I wanted to do forever.
SUCCESS: My boss told me I had the work ethic of an entrepreneur and I should go work for myself. The owners of the company were kind enough to pay my salary and insurance for the rest of the year while I got my foot in the door with real estate.

Ultimately, all these failures and falling on my face over and over again have led to my working in a career I love, which I am incredibly grateful for. I have no doubt I will have more than a few failures ahead of me, but what I’ve learned is no matter how hard I fail, I will always get back up as a better, wiser and more humble person.

To the people who feel like they’re failing or thinking they are not where they want to be right now, try to flip the script and see that right now’s “failures” can ultimately lead to your next success.

I believe eventual success is actually disguised as a string of failures.